Damn you, TJ Max!

It all started late last summer. Strolling through the aisles of TJ Max with Mo...okay, crawling is probably a more appropriate word when speaking of Mo and mobility...I spied the cutest little juice glass with bees on it and decided that I must own it at all costs. Fortunately this was TJ Max and the cost was a scant $2.99, so I bought two of them. That was their whole stock of these adorable bee glasses, a whopping two. Whatever, they are glasses and cute but I have enough glassware and less cabinet space than I need so I'll live, right?

No. No I will not live. These two glasses have beeen in my dishwasher about 400,000 times since last summer because they are not only my favorite glasses, but Mo insists on being served in them each time she comes over...which is often. I really need a full set. However, there is no company name on the bottom. It just says "France". Now we know nothing intrigues me more than something that came from my favorite place ever, and this is something adorable and unique to boot so I am now in a fever over finding more of the glasses. I search everywhere I could think of to no avail.

It didn't even cross my mind to check Sur Le Table. Because I don't think linearly, that's why. French name of a company that sells french things for people who want frenchish stuff for their Table. Who'da thunk my From France (Napoleonic) bee glasses would be there. I search Sur Le Table for linens every once in a blue moon because they have the peacock blue color that I like. Now they have a whole damn series of this bee glassware, as well as having patterns with dragonflies and EIFFEL TOWERS!!! To that I say verily unto them, "SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH!" And not only are they super cute. Turns out they are made by the oldest glassmaker in Europe, one that started seventeen years before Colombus landed on the shores of this continent. It's kinda stunning that it took me this long to find the damn glasses, huh? Oh, wait, I only get on the computer once in a blue moon. Switch that to "kinda timely". Either way, it means they aren't running out of my cute glasses any time soon.

Now I must order a shload of glassware. Anyone know any good ideas for storing a shload of glassware in an eeeeennnsssyyy weeeeennnsssyy space?


Never one for going in one toe at a time...

I have absolutely no idea how, but I suddenly seem to have some extra time on my hands. Maybe it is because I quit smoking and have extra smoking time to use, maybe it's because I went on a diet and no longer spend my smoking time making so many snickerdoodles I have worn out my Silpat, maybe I am just going through my yearly "the sun is starting to wake up earlier so I probably should too" phase in preparation for what I like to call the only worthwhile time of year to live in Kentucky. Who knows?

However, since I have this time I thought maybe I'd throw down with some words kind of regular-like. As usual, this is no guarantee that I'll be doing this again any time soon, but I will try. Unfortunately, since my life has included nothing but a needy and pushy grandmother for the past several years I have little to say. That, of course, has never stopped me so Ima go about this stream of consciousness style.

I have decided that there is no longer anything worthwhile on television. Like nothing. I have a TiVo full of crap and don't really want to watch any of it. Okay, I did watch a documentary from VH1 called Air Guitar Nation that made my morning a bit brighter today, (go and set your TiVo right now. you will not be disappointed) but other than that it's like the Gobi desert of programming. I don't think it is because of the writers' strike either. There wasn't all that much to watch before it started. Granted, I watched it anyway, but now I am kinda sick of it. I thank all kinds of lucky stars that I have my iPod. I've been hiding under it (and some kick-ass new red headphones that cost way more than I am used to paying for headphones but are worth every single penny) with some snappy new music and some yummy old favorites for a couple of weeks. Michael was happy at first since when I have my headphones on I tend to not talk, making it nearly impossible for me to tell him to do things. Now it seems he misses me because he is interrupting my musical solitude every 30 seconds. Who knew?

He'd be better off spending this time looking for the perfect Valentine's Day present since I made the edict "If it can be purchased at Best Buy it is NOT a Valentine's Day present". He blanched when I told him that the first time, then went through every possible scenario in which something he might find at Best Buy might be the perfect V-Day gift. I should say that he unsuccessfully went through the scenarios. Why do boys do that? Yes, I love my iPod and all the wonderous music it contains. Not for Valentine's Day. And here's why...

Michael is at Best Buy about 4 times a week for various and sundry things. He has made it an alarming trend to remember about gift giving holidays the day of said holiday and since he was already at Best Buy for himself he could grab whatever cd/movie/video game manual I might have a passing interest in that he catches sight of on the way out.

No sir. Despite my numerous times laughingly and gently requesting that just because I am a guaranteed lay doesn't mean he doesn't have to put in effort I still get handed a Best Buy bag, reciept and all, every romantical holiday. This has gone on for 4 years. If I have to make an anti-Best Buy edict to get you to put more effort in then that is what I have to do. And did.

And considering I got him THE BEST PRESENT FREAKING EH-VER for aforementioned holiday I don't think it is asking too much. Seriously. Best. Present. Ever. He is going to love it. All I'm asking for is something pretty that doesn't require an electrical outlet. They even have single roses at gas stations on V-day. That'll work. Dollah niny-nine and a guaranteed smiling wife. Contrary to what boys thought about me in college I'm easy.

And spent.

And out.


A few thoughts to keep you updated on the last few months.

I quit smoking exactly 3 months ago today. My friends seem very pleased. My husband seems very jealous. I seem to have about 40% more lung capacity. Who knew?

I have lost somewhere in the neighborhood of 15 pounds since the second week of January. Don't send congrats yet. I gained about 20 when I quit smoking. But I can fit into my jeans again, so that doesn't suck.

I got in a low speed chase with my Osama-bin-law last week. She skeers me. She'll cut a bitch...and she labors under the impression that I am a bitch, so that doesn't bode well.

Mo is the crazy. She's also the jealous and the needy.

I have informed my husband of a new rule for Valentine's Day this year. It goes as follows, "If it can be purchased at Best Buy it is NOT an appropriate Valentine's Day present." He has taken to wandering around the house muttering things under his breath every time a Valentiney commercial reminder comes on tv. I think he might be developing an annurism. So he knows, things purchased at the hospital gift shop aren't Valentine's Day presents either.